


Silence

by Lilliana__8



Category: cowchop
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cowchop - Freeform, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, NovaHD - Freeform, i'll add more tags if needed, thats like it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 17:42:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13439916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilliana__8/pseuds/Lilliana__8
Summary: James did it. He finally confessed his feelings to Aleks. But, the fear of what Aleks would say is answered- not with words, but rather with silence.What was he thinking?





	Silence

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> This is my first work, so sorry if it's bad.. Also, this is unbeta'd so it probably sucks! But, I hope you enjoy it regardless!

  Silence.  
 

  It fell over the room in the worst way, the only noise being the awkward shuffling and gentle breaths.  
 

  "What?"  
 

  The long pause James did only sufficed to make his anxiety and disappointment and fear more significant, his eyes downcast as he processed the rejection that just hit him in his chest like a sword, implanting itself into the muscle and twisting- impeccable pain. He tighten his grip on the cloth of his jeans, his arms straight and taunt, flexing the muscle underneath with the strength that he was using to grab at the blue cloth, taking his sadness out on it.  
 

  "I... I'm sorry."  
 

  James mustered up all of the dignity and confidence he had left, (which wasn't much at this point), and sputtered out the only words that he could. After this indirect rejection of his confession, James wasn't really sure what he could say. The disgust on Aleks' face kinda said it all, though, so he figured that, maybe, he didn't have to say much. I mean, there wasn't really anything else to say, so he just stood there, awaiting the curses and the footsteps as Aleks stormed out of the office, feeling as if he might vomit.  
  Although James knew that he probably wanted to vomit more than Aleks did- because he knew how disgusting he was, how gross he was for thinking like this; feeling like this.  
James peeked up at Aleks face, watching how his expression shifted from total shock, to confusion, to frustration, to...  
 

  What was that expression?  
 

  Aleks' mouth had curved from its previous straight line into a rare smile, genuine and bright. His eyes lit up with his mouth, glimmering underneath the lights of the empty warehouse, and his face had tightened up in a good way, looking relaxed yet a little scrunched up from the shift of his emotions. James was amazed.  
  Still, though, no matter how amazed James was, he knew that he didn't deserve to feel such awe and happiness at the sight of Aleks' smile, so he gazed at the ground sorrowfully, finally accepting his defeat.  
 

  "Look, okay?", James tried not to focus on how broken his voice sounded, how it cracked with every word- "I get that you don't like me anymore, so I'll just-"  
 

  Aleks' face switched again, now into one of shock and disbelief and slight confusion, eyebrows arched up high and mouth opened a little. He had lifted his hand to intercept James, for who-knows-what, and that caused James to cut off his sentence and flinch, ready for a hit that never came. But, I mean, who could blame him? He just confessed that he had feelings for his best friend that shouldn't be there, and with people nowadays, he wouldn't be surprised if Aleks got violent. Even worse, James was okay with it- would just take the hits, because he still loved Aleks. No matter what he did.  
  What he wasn't expecting, though, was the sight of Aleks flinching in the corner of his eye when he flinched, pulling his hand back quickly as if he had just been burnt. James stayed where he was, body still slightly leaning back as it had when Aleks raised his hand, a natural reaction. He gulped and watched Aleks for moment, and then silence fell over the room again.  
 

God, he was so fucking stupid.  
 

James inwardly sighed, shaking his head and catching Aleks' attention as he held himself back- held back the screams and pleas. Held back the cries of one who's heart had been broken. And along with the tears blurring his vision, he held back the love he still harbored for Aleks, pushing it far back into his mind because at this point, he knew it wasn't going to happen.

  Or, at least, that's what he thought.

  So, as James turned to walk away, ready to run out that door and never return, the last thing he expected was for Aleks to speak up. Wow, wasn't this a day of surprises?

  "Wait."

  James paused, mind not wanting to hear Aleks' words, but heart wanting to hear Aleks' voice for the last time. His heart wanted to listen to what Aleks had to say, though, if not only to memorize every slur of certain words and the way he pronounced things, then to satisfy the hope that he didn't want to admit he held; the hope that maybe, just maybe, Aleks wanted him the way he did. Maybe he returned the love.

  So, he did wait, back turnt to Aleks as he kept his head down. Aleks better hurry his ass up, though, because the tears were about to fall and James knew that once they fall they wouldn't be able to stop, and he would just break down right in front of Aleks and-

  "I... I want you."

  James stood shock still, his heart perking up at the words that did not just come from Aleks' mouth, right? Like, that was absolutely impossible-

  Yet again, James's thought process was shut down by something he never dreamed of happening, but just instead of words, he felt a warmth rest itself against his back and arms sneak around his waist, gripping him tightly. He felt the heat of this body against him fill his veins, sending tingles down his spine and butterflies in his stomach as, finally, the tears dripped down his cheeks. He lifted his hand and chuckled brokenly, wiping his tears as his mind began to properly process that this could be real.

  Oh god, he prayed that this ending was real.

  But, even if it wasn't, James leaned into the chest of the person that he loved so dearly, even if he didn't want to believe it anymore. He brought his hand back down to join his other one in grasping the hands that held him, awkwardly intertwining their fingers in a way that made both of them giggle. What children they were, he thought. But that wasn't so bad sometimes.

  Aleks breathed in James's scent, nose brushing the fabric of his shirt as he buried his face in James's back. His heart was pounding in his chest, out of fear when he saw James walking away from him and out of love. Out of the admiration he had of this man. Out of all the times he watched James be himself, his insides feeling as if they were being tickled painfully. Out of all the times he laid in his bed alone, wondering what it'd be like to have James to himself.  
And now, here they were, holding each other in an embrace as they giggled, acceptance echoing in their fulfilled minds. God, how he never wanted this to end.

  Aleks managed to find his voice again after some time, thankfully, as he opened his mouth to voice his feelings. After all, he never was able to tell James how he really felt.

  "James," He breathed in again, face still smothered in James's shoulder and back as he prepared himself. "I know.. I know how cheesy this is gonna sound but...," He inhaled again, "I love you."

  His voice cracked at the end and he felt a uncharacteristic blush rise to his face and travel down to his neck, as well as up to his ears. Fuck.  
  Aleks lifted his head as he felt James turn around in his arms, smile wide on his face as he grinned at Aleks, cheeks red and happy noises rising from his throat. He wrapped his arms around Aleks' neck, before giving out his signature laugh, albit a little quiet. He locked eyes with Aleks, before leaning in to whisper, "I know, you fucker, and I love you, too."

  Aleks pushed his face forward quickly, meeting James' lips more than halfway. They moved in unison, passionate and lovingly, and Aleks swore that he was melting into James right now. But, he must say, that the best part about this was how fucking right it felt, to be holding James and kissing him, sharing their thoughts and feelings and everything in between in an action that made Aleks shiver. Fuck, this was perfect.  
 

  It seemed like forever that they stood there, lips fitting together like puzzle pieces, until they finally pulled away, eyes closed and panting, lips tilted upwards into a bright smile. They touched foreheads, and Aleks was the first one to open his eyes a couple of seconds later, James following.

  "I.. wanted to do that for a long time."

  Aleks awkwardly chuckled at how stupid and cheesy he was being right now, hoping that he wasn't scaring James with how he was being. James just laughed though, and Aleks exhaled in relief that James was okay with how cheesy and classic he was being right now, because James felt like he was acting the same way as Aleks.  
  "I did, too..," James stared into Aleks' eyes as he continued to speak, "but don't fucking scare me like that! I thought you were disgusted and hated me because you didn't say a goddamn word!"  
  Aleks couldn't help to lean his head back in laughter, voice echoing off of the concrete walls as James glared at him, frustration rising again before fizzling out at the sight of Aleks, so happy and carefree and just... him. It was a beautiful sight, James thought, and it was crazy how much he wanted to see it forever.  
After a while, Aleks calmed down, wiping his glistening eyes. A couple of chuckles were still falling from his mouth as he apologized to James though, his happiness overflowing. It felt like a dream still- to him at least- and he was so ecstatic. James was his now.

  "I'm sorry for scaring you like that, and it'll never happen again." Aleks was beaming still, but his laughter died down to nothing. "I love you, though, and you'll never have to go through that ever again."

  His hand slid down James's arm before grasping his hand softly, feeling content as James rested his head against his chest, tightening his grip on Aleks. Aleks blushed deeply, and coughed.  
As they stood there, Aleks couldn't help but become aware of his surroundings again, and just then did he realize how late it had gotten. It seemed like James noticed too from what he spoke up about next.

  "It's, like, 11 o'clock, dude. We should probably head home."

  Aleks watched as James separated himself from Aleks, stretching and glancing around the dark office, just looking. But, Aleks seemed to catch onto this thoughts as James stood there, stalling. He wanted to know if they were going home together.  
 

  Aleks looked at James and opened his mouth to answer his unspoken question with a 'Yes', but decided a better way to do it. He held out his hand, watching James as he stared at it for a couple of seconds, understanding that he was probably deciding, although he knew he didn't need to. Eventually, though, James laid his hand in Aleks' outstretched hand, clenching it with a blush that was visible in the dimness of the empty warehouse. Aleks grinned.  
 

  "Let's go home," Aleks spoke up, happy with James' quiet 'sure' as he led both of them out of the CowChop headquarters, locking the door behind them and walking James to Aleks' car, in which arised the question: What about James's car?  
 

  "We'll get it tomorrow, just get in the car."

  James puffed his cheeks but got into the passenger seat with zero reluctance, silently excited for the night, while Aleks followed in suit, starting up the car.

  And with that, they drove into the lit night, flashing by neon signs and people walking, even with the late time. They were in no rush, taking their time as they enjoyed this little car rid together in silence. Except, this silence was the best kind, James decided. It was full of love and contentedness and just general happiness, their feelings reaching one another- this time in the open air. He breathed Aleks' smile like second nature, catching his eyes at a red light.  
  "Food?" Aleks connected their hands for the third time that night, and it felt like the first. James smiled.  
   
  "You know it."


End file.
